The Ruth Legacy: Conviction and Sacrifice

After my second daughter was born, I wrote my grandmother Alice to tell her that I had named her Alice Ruth.  She wrote me this letter dated September 7, 1998, one month after she was born.

 The other day I was thinking about this letter and decided to do some investigative research to see just how many Ruth's were on our family tree.  Actually, quite a few.

Ruth #1

Ruth Townsend 1789-?

daughter of my 6th great grandparents, James Townsend and Mary Cook

The earliest Ruth I could find, I don't have much information about--only her birth date.  She was born in South Carolina, and her father died when she was 3.  In his will, she was left the plantation along with her siblings.

Her father was disowned by the Quakers when he fought in the Revolutionary War under Colonel Thomas Brandon.  Although it appears he was reinstated after the war.  Her mother then married Ralph Hunt who also died just a few years later.  It was around this time that the Quakers were looking to move to slave-free states.   Many Quakers left South Carolina and moved to Waynesville, Ohio.  She sold their land and moved to Ohio where she married a Quaker Minister named Joseph Cloud in 1810.

Most likely Ruth raised as a Quaker, remained one if she moved to Ohio with her mother.  I could not find a death date nor a marriage date for Ruth, so she may have died as a young child.

The more I study the Quaker religion, the more I see commonalities with the LDS faith.  While our beliefs are not exactly the same, we have experienced the same desire for religious freedom.  The more I learn about my Quaker heritage, the more I appreciate all that they sacrificed.  I'm proud to descend from Quakers.

Ruth #2

Ruth Riding Bagshaw 1877-1930

daughter of my 3rd great grandparents, Christopher Lister Riding and Eliza Adelaide Dolbel

Thanks to familysearch.org, I was able to get this picture and the following information about my 2nd great grandmother's sister, Ruth.

She had a beautiful voice and played the guitar—she was so kind and a great seamstress, and a great gardener
• She had poor health due to a heart condition and was often bedridden and as a result many of the chores fell to the children
• Her husband was a mason in the mines and was often gone for weeks at a time
• She was married in the temple and they had kneeling prayer at every meal

Born and died in St. George.  Baptized in the St. George temple. Married to Robert William Bagshaw for 35 years.  


Ruth's sister Christiana Riding Asay had a daughter named Ruth...

Ruth #3

Ruth Asay Tebbs 1884-1972

daughter of my 2nd great grandparents, Edwin Asay and Christiana Dolbel Riding

Isn't this a beautiful picture of Ruth Asay Tebbs? 

 Fortunately, Ruth was a great writer.  The following information I got from her biography. 

Ruth's father died 10 days before she was born.  Her 27-year-old mother was left to raise five kids on her own.  She decided to move back to Utah and asked her brother George to come down to help move the family.  She gave George the honor of naming her newest baby.  He chose his sister's name, Ruth. 

After moving to Utah, her mother married a man who was 33 years her senior.  Ruth called her step-father "Brother Allphin."  He brother Albert died when she was 8.  

When she was 13, she got a job tending a little boy named Chauncey Steiner.  She would take him home with her and tend him for a week at a time.  She grew to love this little boy.  One time Mrs. Steiner took Chauncy to Salt Lake.  Three days later, Ruth received a telegram saying that 3 1/2 year old Chauncy had died of spinal meningitis.  

Years later Fielding Burnes Tebbs took her out for a boat ride and proposed marriage.  He said that if she didn't say yes, he'd tip the boat over.  She would have married him anyway.  

A year later, her first child Fielding Burnes Tebbs, Jr. was born.  By two years old, he could talk and understand everything.  She sent him to the store to buy a comb, not realizing he was probably too young for such an errand.  When he came back with the comb, he asked if he could run more errands.  By age four, he could read as well as any six year old. When Burnes Jr. was five, he died of tonsillitis.

A couple years later, Ruth got severe appendicitis, the same thing that took her father's life.  Fortunately, an operation was able to save her life. 

Years later, Ruth Tebbs had her sixth child.  A girl whom she named Ruth.    

Ruth #4

Ruth Tebbs Butterfield 1919-2000

cousin to my grandmother, Alice Houston Rasmussen

When Ruth Tebbs married VeLoy Hansen Butterfield, her father asked what she would like as a wedding present.  She said, "For you and Mama to go to the temple with us."  This may not have seemed like a big request, except that her parents had never been sealed in the temple for Burnes, Sr. was not active in the LDS Church.

He replied, "We will."  He then worked on quitting smoking, getting a recommend, and were sealed on Ruth's wedding day.  The following day, Ruth was able to be sealed to her parents, and her husband VeLoy was proxy for little Burnes, Jr. who had died at the age of five.

[Note: Ruth also had a daughter whose middle name is Ruth.]

Ruth #5

Ruth Houston 1903-1910

sister to my grandmother, Alice Houston Rasmussen

My mother's aunt was also named Ruth.  Sadly, my mother never got to know her because Aunt Ruth died one day shy of her 7th birthday.

To read the heart-wrenching story of her and her brother's deaths click here.  

Ruth #6

Ruth Rasmussen 1945-2015

my mother

My mother passed away this past February when she was 68.  She spent the first 53 years of her life always on the go.  Then her feet were crippled and she spent the last 15 years learning how to serve in other ways.  She died quietly and gracefully just a few hours after getting her temple recommend.  

To read stories about my mother's life, click here. 

Ruth #7

Heather Ruth Pack (1969-living)

me

Hey kids!  This is to be my obituary picture.

I have always loved my middle name.  There was a time when I wanted to be called Ruth, but because it was my mother's name I was afraid it would be too confusing.  

As a prolific writer, I have way too many stories to share in this post.  Hop over to my own personal history blog to learn a little more about me.  

http://acertainenglishmanswife.blogspot.com

Ruth #8

Alice Ruth Petranilla Pack (living)

my daughter

 I think all the other Ruth's would be proud she bears their name.  My mom loved to call her "Allie Ruth."

She is clever, smart, witty, and hilarious.  She loves to read books, visit museums, and watch Audrey Hepburn movies.  She has travelled to several countries and hopes to be an astrophysicist someday.  She's a powerful introvert although some mistake her for being shy--which she's not.

Often I marvel that she is my daughter, in many ways we are nothing alike.  But our common middle name bonds us to the Ruth legacy.


I can't end this post without honoring the first Ruth where the name began.

This picture of Ruth by Sandra Rast hangs in our family room

She is the only female to have a book in the Bible named after her.  You can read her story by clicking here.  

For me, the story of Ruth teaches conviction and sacrifice.  As I look at the lives of the Ruth's who have gone before me, I see that is the common thread.  These are women who had strong convictions and were willing to make sacrifices.  I hope the name continues to live on in our family tree, but more importantly I hope their examples and stories never fade.

Looking Upward and Outward

Recently someone, who lives in Farmington, New Mexico and went to church with my mother, reached out to me with this sweet story.  My own comments are in [].

"About four years ago our second son, Will, had routine surgery to remove his tonsils.  He had some somewhat serious complications and had to be admitted to the hospital. It was a hard and scary few days to say the least.  


Unbekownst to us at the time, Ruth was in the hospital at the same time due to continued complications with her feet and was having another portion removed. [She had been battling another infection and had another toe removed.]

In a time when we as a family were looking inward and downward we were strengthened by your mother who was looking upward and outward. 


How easy would it have been to stay up in her room and sulk, or at the least rest from what she had been through. But no, she wheeled herself down to the gift shop and picked out a book and some treats for a little boy she knew might be hurting.  


It took me a few days to truly take in what she did for our family that day. It is now a story that is written in our family journal to help us remember how to be Christlike in all times, in all places, and in all circumstances.  


She had a gift for looking upward and outward."

This post features:

RUTH RASMUSSEN BUCHANAN (1946-2015)

My mother 

me --> Ruth Rasmussen Buchanan

Hallelujah

In Mom's later years, most saw her riding around in a scooter.

What many don't know is why.



In 1999, at my brother's wedding reception, she didn't have a place to keep a single key so she put it in her shoe.  That began a series of events that would ultimately result in her early departure from this earth.

The key caused a blister in the bottom of her foot, which led to an infection, which led to the amputation of some toes, which led to a condition called Charcot foot.

The condition spread to both her feet and for 15 years she had broken feet that would never heal.

Through it all she didn't complain, in fact she rarely even talked about her condition.  She had an extremely high tolerance for pain.  She also had an extremely high desire to live life to the fullest.

The last weekend I spent with her (just weeks before she died) was no exception.  We went shopping and ate Vietnamese food.  We ran to Dairy Queen and got in trouble with Dad for talking too loud.  We ate a simple pot roast dinner on her china and silver.  The other thing we did was listen to her latest favorite album whenever we were in the car.

She had been able to hear Jason Deere perform the songs from this album live.  She loved it so much that she bought a copy for my two missionaries.

As we listened to the songs, she gave me the lyrics so that I could follow along.  We got to a song titled "Blind" sung by Alex Boye.  

She told me that Alex sang the song in the studio on his knees with his eyes closed.  As a big fan of Alex Boye, I was impressed that he would sing it so humbly. 

After my mom passed away, I bought my own copy of Redeemer.  

Tonight I was listening to the album and the song "Blind" came on.  This time the words had a new meaning for me. She had faith in Jesus Christ and knew that one day her feet would be completely healed. 

Like Alex, she had a beautiful singing voice and I can imagine it joining his when he sings:

"And I feel hands on me now

And I feel His fingers lift from off my face

He says, 'Thy faith hath made thee whole'

As blackness turns to grey

Behold, I see the light

Behold I see the miracle

Behold I hear the prophets of old echo in my ears

And I feel my warm face wet from all my tears

As I behold the Messiah, Emmanuel

He who's come into this world to change us all

Hallelujah!"

It's so easy to look back and say "If only she hadn't put that key in her shoe." But that single act would lead to over a decade of miracles, drawing her and her family closer to our Savior.

A Savior who has healed my mom

  and will one day heal me

Hallelujah.

This post features:

Ruth Rasmussen Buchanan (1946-2015)

My mother and me

me --> Ruth Rasmussen Buchanan

Mom, I have something to tell you...

On February 21, 2015 our family gathered around my mother one last time.

As we stood there with our arms wrapped around one another, I spoke up.

"Mom, I have something to tell you..."

1976

My first brother was born in October of 1976.  My sister, Kristi, and I were excited to finally have a sibling.  It had just been the two of us for quite a while.  We were 7 and almost 6 and eager to take care of him.

One of our favorite things to do was feed him his bottle.  Was it because we loved to hold him?  No.  Was it because we wanted to give Mom a break?  No.  It was because of what was in the bottle. 

http://www.tvacres.com/candies_jello.htm

That's right.  Lime-flavored Jell-O.  She would mix some of the gelatin powder in warm water for Ryan to drink.  

Kristi and I would fight to take turns feeding him.  As we watched him guzzle that sugary goodness, sometimes the temptation was just too great and we would quickly pull the bottle out of Ryan's mouth, and put the nipple in our mouth and drink.

That's right.  

We would drink out of the bottle!

Then we would quickly put it back in Ryan's mouth hoping we wouldn't get caught. 

You know what they say about keeping secrets?  

Two people can keep a secret as long as one of them is dead.

In our case, 

Two sisters can keep a secret as long as both of them have the same secret.

Somehow we both decided that drinking out of the bottle was the worst sin that could be committed.  It trumped all other sins.  

"I'm going to tell Mom you just hit me."

"Then, I'm going to tell Mom you drank out of the bottle."

Silence.

For years we held onto the secret that we had drunk green Jell-O water.  Until...

2015

"Mom, I have something to tell you... Kristi drank out of the bottle."

I feel so much better.

This post features:

RUTH RASMUSSEN BUCHANAN (1946-2015)

My mother 

me --> Ruth Rasmussen Buchanan

The Daisy

Before the closing of Mom's casket, I read a story I had written about Mom's love for daisies.

The Daisy

In a garden are many flowers. 

Some bloom in the early spring; 

others appear when the leaves turn gold.

But one flower blooms during the long summer days—in the driest of soil, 

under the hottest of the sun’s rays, 

and among the peskiest of insects

—the daisy.

Because of their bright centers and open petals, bees are especially attracted to daisies. 

This allows their pollen to spread throughout the entire garden.

Mimi was like a daisy.  She was able to bloom no matter how hard her life became. All who knew her were attracted to her, which allowed her to touch lives in places she could not go.

Even though she is no longer with us, her laughter, love, and joy still remains.  Whenever we see a daisy, we can remember our dear Mimi and our Savior who has made it possible for us to see her again. 

This post features:

RUTH RASMUSSEN BUCHANAN (1946-2015)

My mother 

me --> Ruth Rasmussen Buchanan

The Time to Be Happy Is Now

The time to be kind is now.

The place to be kind is here.

We needn't be told the way to be kind

For the way to be kind is clear.

But it's good to pause and remember

In the heat of our stress and drive,

The very best time to live

Is while we are still alive.

The time to be happy is now.

The place to be happy is here.

The way to be happy is to make others happy

Simple enough, I fear.

But the simple things we are apt to miss

As we struggle and fret and strive,

Forgetting the very best time to live

Is while we are still alive.

~Anonymous

This poem was read by her Stake President, President Palmer, at her funeral.

This post features:

RUTH RASMUSSEN BUCHANAN (1946-2015)

My mother 

me --> Ruth Rasmussen Buchanan

Interview with Mimi and Grandpy

Recently my niece interviewed my parents for a school project.  They were kind enough to share it with me.  I thought their answers warranted a blog post so that all of their grandchildren and future great grandchildren could read them.  These are great questions that all grandchildren should ask their grandparents.  According to an article in the NY Times, children handle stress better when they know their family history.

Question 1
What games did you play at recess when you were in school? Did they play with both boys and girls?

Grandpy:

 I went to a private school when I was in Grade School.  Sometimes the boys and girls played together and as we got older we played separately.  In the the early years we played "rover red rover, send Sally Jane over", hopscotch, marbles, and kick the can or steal the flag.    When we were older we played "touch football", baseball, and marbles.  We had recess in the morning (before lunch) and then again in the afternoon.  By the fourth grade we only had recess in the morning and by 7th grade we didn't have recess.

Mimi:

Because I was born after World War 2 in 1946, I am from a generation called the "Baby Boomers". Lots of children were born then until 1964 when the boom ended. So I was a child in the "50"'s.  I went to Central School from the 1st grade until the 3rd grade. During recess, we played hopscotch, rover red rover, and spent a lot of time on play equipment called the "monkey bars".  Children got hurt sometimes on the monkey bars probably because we landed just in the hard dirt if we fell.  Do they have them at your school?  They had swings which we had to race to from class just to get a turn on them.  I loved to swing and could go very high.  As the boys did, girls also played marbles, but I mostly played jacks at recess.  My mom would play jacks with me at home just to practice.  She was very good.

Then for the 4th thru 6th grade, I went to Harding School, which was right next door to Central School and it even shared a big lot.  But the younger kids couldn't go over and play with the older kids.  At Harding, we played dodgeball most of the time, boys and girls together.  It was a lot of fun unless you got hit in the face with the big rubber ball.  We would run bases, and the other side would throw a ball at us to get us out.  Kids played it a lot during the lunch hour. I only ate "hot lunch" at school one time, and on my way to sitting down, spilled my tray all over my new gray poodle skirt. I walked home during all of my school years from 1st through 12th grade to eat lunch.  That was our biggest meal of the day, and my mom was the greatest cook.  My Dad would come home at the same time to eat too.  I loved that time most of all!

Question 2:What chores or jobs did you do when you were young?

Grandpy:

My chores were to empty the garbage, fill the coal hopper for the furnace, take out the clinkers from the furnace, make my bed, and do my homework before I could play outside.  In the summer, I mowed the lawn.  
from the time I was 10 to 15 years old I sold worms in the summer.  My worms were the most expensive in town.  I sold them for .25 cents a dozen.  I mowed lawns and when I could drive, I would haul coal from a nearby mine in a pickup to peoples homes.  I would put the coal in their coal bin.  I payed $3.00 for a ton of coal and sold it delivered for $ 6.00.  I mowed lawns and cleaned yards for $0.50 an hour.  I never got an allowance but always seemed to have money.  I had a savings account at the bank and when I was 12 my account had $100.00.  Today that would be like having several thousand dollars.  One summer when I was 16 years old I worked washing dishes and cleaning floors for a restaurant called the Totem Cafe. I worked 7 days a week all summer.  My bosses name was Frosty and his wife was Ramona.  I saved $900.00 that summer and $1000.00 the next summer.  That year I went to college and my books and tuition for the YEAR was around $250.00.

Mimi:

As for chores, I was the youngest girl like you, and my brother wasn't born until I was 5.  So as the baby of the family, I wasn't expected to do very much.  We played outside all of the time, so I wasn't in the way for my Mom to get her work done.  I'm sure my 2 older sisters did a lot more washing of the dishes than I ever did. I was pretty spoiled for the most part.  I remember begging my Mom to let me iron when I was 10, so she let me iron the pillowcases to give me something to do.  I shared a room and the same bed with my sister Helen, who was 5 years older than me.  That wasn't too fun for her, but I loved it.  I was a teenager before I had my own room.  I remember dusting the living room furniture on Saturdays and eventually vacuuming the carpet when I was older.  Once my sisters left home, I did more around the house.

Question 3:Did you take any trips when you were young or go on vacations.  How did you get there? How often did you go?

Grandpy:

We didn't take to many vacations.  Once we went to Yellowstone when I was about 10.  My Grandmother ( Ma Buchanan) went with us.  She was old, not much fun and my sister was a pill.  My dad and I went camping and fishing all the time.  We were gone most every weekend in the summer fishing somewhere.  We went on horses once into the Unitah mountains.  In the fall we went hunting and camped out when we were gone.  I started fly fishing when I was about 10.  I used a bamboo rod and still have that rod today.  In the winter we went duck hunting.  I shot my first deer when I was 11 and my first duck when I was 10.  When we traveled we went in a car.  When we went hunting and fishing we had a jeep wagon and always went in it.  One vacation that I remember was with my Grandparents (Grampy and Nona).  They took me to San Francisco when I was about 8.  We say a play called "South Pacific" stayed in a fancy hotel, called the Mark.  We went in a 1950 Buick and saw California.  We drove through a tree in the Redwoods.  My Grampy and Nona really loved me and took really good care of me.  My Nona died on my birthday when I was 10.  I really missed her.  Later my Grampy moved to Pueblo CO. and every summer and Christmas I stayed with him and his new wife Zoetta for two weeks.  He taught me how to play Bridge, Poker, Pool, Bowl and eat greasy hamburgers.  He was a lot of fun.  I stopped going when I turned 16.  He died when I was going to school in Bozeman Mt.  Your mom was about 9mos. old when he died.  

Mimi:

We went on fun trips when we were young.  I loved traveling with my family.  The first trip I went on when I was a baby, so I don't remember, was to Yellowstone Park in my Dad's first car, a Buick.  We went there many times over the years, and to this day I still love going to Yellowstone Park and West Yellowstone.  It's one of Grandpy's favorites too.  We always travelled by car, and not very roomy cars like we have today.  We went to Oregon so my Dad could compete in trap shooting.  He always wanted us kids to continually look out of the window at all the scenery so we wouldn't miss anything.  He didn't travel fast, and made us look at EVERYTHING.  I was usually sitting on the floor of the car because my sisters took up so much room on the backseat.  Fun times. We also went on a fun trip to Hollywood, California to see my aunt  with just my mom, sisters and little brother.  My dad was deer hunting and didn't even know we went.  My 17 year old sister drove most of the trip.  That was before Disneyland was there.  What I remember the most about that trip was picking grapefruit from my aunt's tree for breakfast.  My first trip to Disneyland was when I was twelve at Christmastime.  I had new red silky pajamas and a crazy looking stuffed monkey Santa brought me, and I carried him with me everywhere on that trip.  I still have him.

My favorite trip was to Lake of the Woods in Ontario Canada.  We drove  through many states to get there.  We had a large cabin and stayed two weeks.  My dad went fishing on a large lake every day with a guide my dad hired named Johnny.  Dad would take my mom or one of us kids each day too.  At lunch time we stopped on a little island, and Johnny would cook any fish we caught for us to eat.  It was the best I remember eating.  He taught my dad how to filet a fish, and mom how to cook them. As kids, we could go to the little convenience store by the cabins and get anything we wanted, and it was just charged, so we never needed any money.  Of course my dad had to pay the bill at the end of the stay.  I went everyday for a Big Chief red soda.  I loved it!

We also went rock hunting on the weekends during the spring and summer in different parts of Southern Utah.  My dad was a "rock hound" and made beautiful jewelry out of rocks that he cut and polished.  We went with other families and loved being in the desert.

Question 4:What was an important even in your life?

Grandpy:

 An important event in my life.  There have been so many.  When your aunt Heather and your Mom were born was pretty special.  The day I married Mimi.  Going to the temple and being sealed to Mimi and your aunt Heather, your Mom and uncle Ryan.  When I was baptized by your greatuncle Art.  Finishing a Ph.D in Bozeman.   When my parents died has come to mean a lot to me.  Almost dying when I ate a mushroom was an event that really changed my life.  The first time I walked through a temple.  Setting a National Record when I was 17.  Being called into a Stake Presidency.  Turning 60 years old. My father died when he was 58.  Backpacking with 4 sons for hundreds of miles and climbing Engineer peak with Adam 10 years ago.  Getting hearing aids.  Going to Alaska with 3 sons.  Selling a business that I had for over 40 years.  Winning the Don Roush award as the Outstanding Teacher at NMSU.  Maybe the most important event in my life has not happened yet, but if I had to pick ONE that has, it would be to do with the day I decided to be baptized.  The church means everything to me and having a testimony of the restored Gospel defines me more than anything.  

Mimi:

Those were probably the big events of my younger years.  The other activity that took up my summers was 4H. I joined when I was ten until I was 18.  It was a program where my mom was a leader and my friends and I learned to cook and sew.  Then we would enter our products in the county and state fairs to be judged.  Those were such fun times.  When my friend Jane and I were 16, we won a state food preparation contest, and a trip to Denver Colorado for a big convention of youth.  We stayed downtown Denver in a large hotel and had tours and fancy dinners with ice sculptures.  That was the first time I ever ate cheesecake, and I thought it was so good. I also sang the 4H song at the final banquet of the week in the new Hilton Hotel. They had a light on me in a darkened room with a flag waving behind me.  I was petrified, but I did it.

This post features:

Bruce Albert Buchanan (living) and Ruth Rasmussen (1946-2015)

my parents

me-->Bruce Albert Buchanan and Ruth Rasmussen Buchanan